flashsmashcarcrash:

“And All.”

Photoshop CS5.1 and wacom tablet

S. Mash 2011

This is the sister piece to 

http://flashsmashcarcrash.tumblr.com/post/10056174547

This is part of a two illustration series to go with my short memoir piece called Blue Veins and All. It includes a sort of meta retelling of when I was misdiagnosed with brain cancer at age 15 and a bit of reflection on my relationship with my mother.

Blue Veins and All indirectly talks about how I briefly considered suicide during this time of my life. Luckily the doctors eventually found out that I did not have cancer—the deposits they mistook for tumors formed in my brain before I was born and most likely will always be harmless. 

None the less my mentality took a serious blow, and my body had already been put through some awful testing that took a while to forget—I also missed a lot of school and fell into a slight depression. None the less this situation let me break out of this barrier that was keeping me down. I stopped hanging out with people I disliked and realized that even if no one else likes me for who I really am in high school someone will someday. And that is true, I’m much happier now. This cancer scare also helped me realize my love of creating both written word and art.

(To avoid confusion, this is a self portrait, and the three white dots on my head represent the three places I have these deposits that the doctors mistook for cancer.)

-S. Mash

(via indsa)